TTM #10 USEFUL BELIEFS

Watch the intro to the episode HERE.

Before we start believing new things and thinking new thoughts, the first step is to become aware of what we already believe.
Next, we need to practice, on purpose, thinking new thoughts that will serve us.

In this week’s episode, I explore how to believe something that we don’t yet believe, and share some of my useful thoughts that I practice in my daily life.

You are welcome to adopt some of these thoughts or come up with your own thoughts to believe that feel true and support you on the way to your goals and dreams, and the version of yourself you want to become!

My useful beliefs:

• My brain is a tool, and I am the manager. 
• It’s just a thought, and a thought can be changed.  
• The worst thing that can happen is an emotion.
• I can be happy either way. 
• I am responsible for everything I think and feel. 
• I create my human experience on this earth. 
• Suffering is optional. 
• Life is happening for me. 
• My future is bigger than my past. 
• Worrying pretends to be necessary but creates nothing useful. 
• Everything is figureoutable.
• All the answers are within me. 
• I am part of the solution, not the problem.
• Nothing is too good to be true.
• We live in an abundant universe. 
• If I believe in magic, I will attract magic.
• I am exactly as I should be.
• It's not your job to like me. 
• It is not about me.
• I am exactly where I should be right now.
• When you argue with reality, you lose— but only 100% of the time. 
• Change is the natural law of my life.
• We can’t change people.
• People are doing the best they can.
• Love is always an option.
• Discomfort is the currency for success.
• Hard things are hard on purpose.
• Never sacrifice your integrity for the goal. 

TTM#10 BELIEVING ON PURPOSE - SELF ENQUIRY

• What are your current beliefs that do not serve you?
• What are you committed to believing on purpose?

-> MEDITATION ON THOUGHT AWARENESS.
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Transcript

TTM #10 USEFUL BELIEFS

You are listening to me talking to myself, welcome to the podcast where I share some useful tools, insights, and questions to make us feel more peaceful, more present, more connected, and empowered to create.

If you haven't listened to the previous episodes ‘believing on purpose’, I would recommend doing so as it is the foundation for this one.

In this episode, I discuss how to believe something we do not believe yet. before we can start believing new things and practicing new thoughts, it is important to understand and be aware of what we are thinking right now. Believing is deciding and accepting that something is true. It does not make it true. It just makes us believe it is true. This is what makes a belief a belief.

If we want to disbelieve something, we first have to realise that we have accepted something as true and decide to change our minds about it. We have learned to believe something by practice and repetition. So we will have to un-accept it as true and believe something different on purpose. Truth is not something that exists outside of us. It is a decision. Facts are facts whether we believe them or not. Truths are choices. What we believe and focus our mind on is a choice. Most of the time we are in a default believing in thinking mode. We're just replaying beliefs that have been programmed and practiced.

Which truth do we want to believe on purpose and focus on. what do we want to believe and what do we want to disbelieve?

Our thought directs our brain. It tells our brain what to look for and what to focus on. And then the brain seeks evidence to support that belief. This is the difference between the truth and what we believe. And this is why it is so important to choose what we want to believe on purpose, and then start scanning for evidence.

The brain doesn't like change. When we change a belief, it goes against comfort. As we think differently, our brain will resist with dissonance. This means we are doing it right. It will feel like a lot of effort to take massive action toward a new thought. our brain wants to stick with old thoughts and old evidence. It is a survival pattern that we need to outgrow. This requires us to move towards discomfort on purpose in order to evolve into the next best version of ourselves.

Our brain likes to be efficient. It likes to think things it's already thought before. thoughts that are familiar. It does not filter out negative thoughts or thoughts that are not useful. It just chooses the path of least resistance and keeps believing what it has believed for many years and what is comfortable. and those thoughts might sound like ‘you're not good enough. You don't have enough experience. You're not competent enough. You're not pretty enough, you can’t do this. It might be a thought you were introduced to at an early age. You may have been thinking for years and years and you might not even realise that it is a thought. you may think it is just an observation. You may think that is just reality and truth. So the first step is becoming aware of those thoughts that we are thinking, and then we want to practice on purpose thinking new thoughts that will serve us.

 so what would be some useful thoughts to believe?

In this episode, I'm sharing some of my personal beliefs that are working for me and supporting me in my daily life. You're welcome to adopt some of those beliefs or come up with your own thoughts to believe that feel true and good and support you on the way to your goals and dreams. And the version of yourself you want to become.

It's just a thought.

It's just the thoughts and our thoughts can be changed. Every thought is optional. A thought is harmless unless we believe it. It's not our thoughts but our attachment to thoughts that causes our suffering. attaching to your thoughts means believing that it's true without inquiring. A belief is a thought that we have been attaching to often for years. Whatever negative emotion we experience it is caused by a thought, and thought can be changed, and therefore the emotion. and also, do not believe everything you think. you are not your thoughts. They are just suggestions. And it doesn't mean you need to believe them and act on them. We only do three things in life. We sit, we stand, we lie horizontal, the rest is just a story about what it means. So question your beliefs. You could be wrong about them.

My brain is a tool.

My brain is a tool and I'm the manager. I program my brain to serve my purpose and to achieve my goals. Every thought is optional and I choose thoughts that serve my highest purpose on this earth.

The worst thing that can happen is an emotion.

The worst thing that can happen is an emotion and an emotion is just a vibration in my body. It is not a big deal.

Whatever we do or do not do in our life is because of the feeling we want or do not want to experience. It is not about things happening in our life. It's about negative emotions we might experience when those things happen. Rejection, disappointment, embarrassment, irritation, resentment, anger, jealousy, boredom, restlessness, or fear. Our brain wants us to stay comfortable and avoid any negative emotion that might be uncomfortable.

And this is not useful when we are setting goals and growing into the next version of ourselves. Setting goals is scary. We might experience disappointment or embarrassment in the process. Growing is uncomfortable; we might experience rejection or irritation.

Negative emotions are part of our life. It is not about hiding from them and staying comfortable. The better we get at processing negative emotions, the more freedom we have, the more we'll be able to accomplish because we are not afraid of experiencing them. As humans, we are designed to experience all emotions. No matter what happens, I'm going to be okay because the worst that can happen is an emotion and I know how to experience emotions. And there is not an emotion that I'm not willing to experience. I will discuss the topic of emotions in one of the later episodes.

I can be happy either way.

I can be happy either way. Happiness is a choice. happiness is an inside job. Happiness is a feeling. Feelings are created by our thoughts.

So whatever happens in my life, I can generate emotion with my thoughts if I want to. Happiness does not come from the outside. Everything we do or do not do in our life is because of the feeling we think we will have when we get it. And it usually comes down to happiness. And the truth is, we can have this feeling right now. We just need to think happy thoughts. The other question is if this is what we want, feeling happy all of the time.

Or maybe it is being human and feeling all of the things.

If we are making a decision, choosing which one would make us happy or happier. Should I do this or should I do that? Should I start this job? should I move to this country? Should I marry this person? Notice, those are all external objects that will never make us happy. You are the one creating your own happiness. So whatever choice you make, you can be happy either way. It's not your job’s job to make you happy. It's not your partner's job to make you happy. It's not your money's job to make you happy.

I am responsible for everything I think and feel.

I'm responsible for everything I think and feel. No one can make me feel a certain way. No one can make me happy. That's my job. But also, no one can hurt me. That's my job too.

As long as you think that the cause of the problem is out there, as long as you think that someone or something is responsible for your suffering, the situation is hopeless. It means that you are forever in the role of a victim.

So often we think when someone did something or said something, it has something to do with us. And usually, those are insecurities that we haven't owned.

If someone says to you, ‘I hate your green hair’. Let's say you do not have green hair. So you would be like, ‘What is she saying? This has nothing to do with me’. You would not take it personally and it would not offend you. But if someone makes a comment about your weight or your appearance, you may take that personally because on some level you may believe it as well. Everybody and everything just mirrors back what we need to see in ourselves.

I create my human experience on this earth.

I create my human experience on this earth. Whatever happens to me I have the power to think about it in any way I want. Circumstances are always neutral. And our thoughts about those circumstances create the result and our experience. How is it possible that when two people attend the same event, one of them has the best experience of his life and one of them is disappointed? It's so easy to blame someone or something outside of us for how we experience life. If you're a fun person, everything you do will be fun. If you find something boring or someone boring, maybe it's just you who is boring.

So what do you think about meditation? This is where you are present with yourself. You can't be bored if you truly enjoy the company of your own mind.

If you don't like your world, question your thoughts about it.

Suffering is optional. 

Suffering is optional. We created our suffering without attachments, cravings, aversions wanting to change someone or something, looking externally for things and people who provide us with something we want, arguing with reality, and believing everything we think. And realising that we are the ones creating our suffering, which is optional, gives us a lot of freedom.

Life is happening for me.

Life is happening for me, not to me. Everything and every challenge is an opportunity to grow, evolve, contribute and show up bigger.

Everything is happening for me. I'm the one deciding what I want to think about everything that happens. During meditation, every distraction is just an opportunity to practice being present. As I say yes to life, life says yes to me.

My future is bigger than my past.

My future is bigger than my past. We live in an ever-expanding unlimited universe. The possibilities available to us are far beyond what our human minds can imagine. The only thing that ever limits us is our thinking. We waste our thoughts thinking of limitations. Every thought we think is creating our future. The past has no power over us. Our power lies in the thoughts that we choose to think today. Your future is your property. Because by definition it hasn't happened yet. It only exists in your mind. For to be successful and own your future, you must always make it bigger than your past.

Talk to your future self. What would my future self think, feel and do in this situation? So thinking about that version of yourself you want to become and exploring thoughts and feelings from your future self and then taking action from that place. I act as if I already have what I want.

Worrying pretends to be necessary.

Worrying pretends to be necessary, but creates nothing useful. How often do we worry about something that might happen in the future? Wasting time and energy on something that might never happen?

Worrying creates fear and stress which does not add to the solution, but more to the problem. I will deal with a problem when it's there. And there might be also no problem after all.

Everything is figureoutable.

Everything is figureoutable. I have this one from Marie Forleo. Whatever might happen in the future, I trust myself to figure it out. I trust the guidance within, I trust the process. I trust the knowledge and wisdom I have within, all the answers are within me, all the answers are within me. How often do we say “I don't know”?. Every time we say ‘I don't know’, I don't know what to do. I didn't know what I want. I don't know what to choose. Every time we say I don't know we block ourselves from receiving the guidance and wisdom we all have within. We need to take a moment to be quiet and listen to what we do know. And we know a lot. Instead, ask yourself what if I did know?

When we see the unknown as darkness and we have the courage to enter it without resistance and fear but with curiosity and belief that with every step, and with every action I take with the tools and knowledge I have right now, the path will be lightened up in front of me, that every decision I make will be the right one and it will give me the next direction. Realising that the light is within me. It just requires courage, faith, and action. No matter how dark, I can figure out the way if I trust the process. And the more I believe in myself, the lighter the path will be and the easier it will be to navigate the darkness which will dissolve in the end as I see every step as an opportunity and open myself up to the possibilities in me.

I am part of the solution.

I'm part of the solution, not the problem.

We complain and judge and express opinions about why things do not work. But we can present the problem and then we can focus on the solution. We're all tempted to justify the problem and explain the problem complaining about the problem which is actually quite useless. When we focus on talking about the solution, we engage that another part of the brain that is creative and wise, we do not entertain that primitive, danger-seeking part of the brain. Do not let people pull you into their storm. Pull them into your peace. Do not become one of them. Show them the way how it's done. Do not complain about things, do not add to the aggression in the world. Be part of the solution, not the problem. Radiate your own frequency rather than absorbing the frequencies around you. Start imprinting your intent on the universe rather than receiving an imprint from existence.

Nothing is too good to be true.

Nothing is too good to be true. Sometimes when everything seems great, we feel like something might happen because life is just too amazing. So we actually are attracting that something to happen because we are uncomfortable as we're used to struggle with some things and when the struggle is gone, we have a new identity. We lost weight, we have more money, we have a house. It seems like there should be something that is not working out well.

And no, there should not. It might happen but go back to ‘Worrying it pretends to be necessary’. Enjoy your amazing life.

We live in an abundant universe.

We live in an abundant universe. There is plenty for everyone. Abundance is around us but sometimes we limit what we see and allow in. There is no limited amount of success, or money, whatever you want to create, whatever is meant for me to create and have, will be there.

If I believe in magic, I will attract magic.

If I believe in magic, I will attract magic. And I do believe in magic. So direct your brain to find magic everywhere, in small things that happened during the day.

I am exactly as I should be.

I am exactly as I should be. The brain will always offer us some kind of version of ‘I'm not good enough.’ I don't have enough experience, I should be this I should be that. So it is important to remind it sometimes that the way I am and the way the world is, is exactly how it should be, and redirect our brain to find evidence. We all have a unique set of ingredients that nobody else has. So the recipes that we cook will also be different and unique to us. And this is also what is needed in the world. To be your authentic self with all your strengths and weaknesses and talents, accents, and opinions. The world needs our gifts.

It's not your job to like me.

It's not your job to like me. It's mine. Let people be wrong about you.

It is not about me.

It is not about me. This is a powerful one.

It is not about me when I'm serving people. Letting go of the ego and focusing on the people I serve. So I can show up in the best way.

It is not about me when somebody is angry at me. It means this person is just off-centre. If you have peace and harmony within you, would not feel compelled to show up disrespectfully, be unkind or say negative or inappropriate things.

It is also not about me when somebody does not have the capacity to see all of me. Some people are just not ready. And some people are not capable to show up in a certain way. To be respectful, to be present, to listen, to understand, to love. It is very important to do your inner work, so you know and see your value. So you set boundaries for those who don't and you do not have to prove yourself to anyone.

I'm exactly where I should be right now.

How often do we say things like ‘At this age, I should be doing this, I should be married, I should have children’, etc.? Or hear other people say that. And those thoughts are just suggestions.

And those thoughts or suggestions create suffering and are not useful. I trust the process of my life. I trust the guidance within. Whatever I need to know is revealed to me at the exactly right time.

When we argue with reality, we'll lose but only 100% of the time.

When we argue with reality, we'll lose that only 100% of the time.

This one is from Byron Katie.

How do we know that it should be raining right now? Because it's raining. How do you know that you are where you should be right now? Because this is where you are right now. Arguing with reality is a waste of time and it's useless. It was always supposed to happen this way because it did.

When we argue with our past, the past is over, it is a reality we cannot change. When we argue with it and believe that it should have been different, we lose. When we argue with our current circumstances that we cannot change, we lose. I'm 31 years old. It is not something I can change. So there is no point for me to argue that I should be younger or older than I am. When we argue with the reality of what's inevitably going to happen, we will lose as well. When we argue with the fact that one day we all will die. It is a natural part of life. We will lose because it will inevitably happen and there is no point in resisting it. When we can accept and say yes to the reality of what is, when we can love what is, that's when we win because we release the resistance.

Change is the nature of my life.

Change is the nature of my life. I welcome change and I am willing to change. I choose to change my thinking. I choose to change the words I use. I move from the old to the new with ease and joy.

We can't change people.

We can't change people. We are not that powerful. We can create conditions for them to change and let it happen. People will change when their thoughts will change. It is not something in our power, which gives us a lot of freedom. But also we do not have to. The only reason why we want to change someone is so we can feel better. The only person I need to change is me. Everyone and everything outside of us mirrors back what we need to see in ourselves. Things that trigger me have nothing to do with the other person. When we judge someone for something, we are actually judging ourselves for the very same thing we haven't fully owned or accepted within us yet.

People are doing the best they can.

People are doing the best they can with the tools they have. I borrowed this one from Brene Brown. We always do the best we can with the tools we have right now. Even if it does not look like that. And it might not be true, but believing it is serving me to let go of a lot of judgment, anger, and disappointment. And it lets me focus on what is and not what should or could be.

Love is always an option.

Love is always an option and unconditional love is something I choose for myself. Any emotion we experience, we are the first ones feeling that emotion, not actually the object. If I choose to hate someone or something, I'm the one feeling the hate, not actually the object of my hate.

And love also means setting boundaries and saying no.

I love this one from Byron Katie. Our job is unconditional love. The job of everyone else in our life is to push our buttons.

Discomfort is the currency for success.

Discomfort is the currency for success. The discomfort of growth is always better than the discomfort of stagnation. So if you're going to feel uncomfortable, you can either feel uncomfortable growing or you can feel uncomfortable stagnating, you will feel discomfort either way. That discomfort of growth keeps us evolving. It keeps us moving forward. Not choosing growth will not feel comfortable. We can stay there and be familiar, but there will always be the discomfort of not following that urge inside of us to become better and more of who we are. Our human instinct is to grow, to move, to create. And when we honour that, we feel more alive.

Hard Things are hard on purpose.

Hard Things are hard on purpose and I can do hard things. I can do things that feel impossible because nothing is impossible until it's done. I choose the discomfort of growth over the discomfort of stagnation. I'm willing to move towards fear and get to the other side knowing that the universe will always guide me and support me the more I move towards fear and towards discomfort because I know that discomfort is the currency for success. 

Never sacrifice your integrity for the goal.

Never sacrifice your integrity for the goal. In the words of Napoleon Hill. Great achievement is usually born of sacrifice. Success has a price and we must be willing for the trade-off if we want to accomplish something meaningful. We have to be willing to let go of many things, saying no to distractions and temptations, letting go of people who do not serve us, and focusing on our goals. However, there are things that define us and what our life is about and this is our integrity. If I achieve my goals while sacrificing my values, self-respect, and integrity, it will not feel authentic and true. We are sacrificing what is within us for something that is outside of us. And that external object, circumstance, or goal will never bring us happiness anyway. We might achieve that goal but we will lose our truth, our honesty, our trust credibility, and authenticity in the process. And something external will never make us happy.

Of all the thoughts in this world, what thoughts are you choosing to believe on purpose and focus your mind on?

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